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| Men are the new women |
| Monday, March 06, 2006 |
My fellow men, there is a new breed of women out there. You may have recently run into them. If not, you will soon, and once you do, you won't forget it.
I'm talking about brodettes. Bro + dudettes.
The term was coined by my friend Audrey, and I'm thinking my definition may differ from her's. Nevertheless, I'm hijacking her word for my own.
Let me define a brodette for you: She acts like guys used to act in relationships (i.e., aloof, not caring, casual, cold, etc.). You may fall for this girl, but she's not going to fall for you, because she'll claim she's young and doesn't want to be tied down. She may even claim that she doesn't date and then proceed to have sex with you several times in a one month period before unexpectedly giving you the cold shoulder one day.
Isn't this the way guys used to act? It appears now that guys are really the new girls. They're sensitive, they're nice, they're sincere, and they usually make their feelings known to the person in which they're interested. Does the brodette care? No.
Theories were thrown around the other night as to why girls and guys are switching roles. One is that advertisers are marketing to the highly profitable teenage girl demographic, and what is less threatening than an effeminate guy selling a girl hair products? Men (and young boys) see these commercials, and subconsciously (or consciously) they affect them in all matters of dress, attitude and feelings.
Another theory is the demise of the western film. There are no John Waynes or Steve McQueens. Onscreen machos today are such actors as Brad Pitt and Tom Cruise. Men see these guys and think they have to act like them in order to get girls.
So, is there a way to counteract the ways of the brodette? Apparently, the only way is for the guy to be a bigger asshole than the girl. It seems that girls are still attracted to assholes and their callous ways.
For me, this is next to impossible to do. I'm not saying I don't have my asshole moments, but overall, I'm a nice guy. I was raised to respect people and to be sincere around everyone. Aren't these supposed to be good qualities? I guess they're not to a brodette.
For example, I'm not seeking a monogamous relationship at this time. I'm not opposed to one, either. I want to keep things casual. But whenever I'm nice to a girl and give her attention, she automatically assumes that I want something deeper. What is wrong with enjoying someone's company and wanting to spend time with them? To a brodette, this is the wrong behavior to exhibit, at least if you want to be with her.
All of history is a giant pendulum, and now it's being swung in favor of women. You better get used to it men. After hundreds (thousands?) of years of treating women like shit, it's our turn to be shitted on. |
posted by pimplomat @ 7:44 AM  |
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| 10 Comments: |
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I can only guess what happened this weekend. (psst, that's sarcasm)
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You've hit it on the head--the brodette is very real and more than a little scary. But I can promise you, there are many, many jackasses still in the male dating pool. Maybe they're just getting more company with female counterparts. I think the lesson is don't date people under 25. Immaturity is a big factor in shitty behavior.
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Wow. I see subtlety has also left the building.
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One more thing...
Maybe, just maybe us girls got tired of putting up with a bullshit double standard and decided what was good for ya'll could be ok for us too.
Just a thought.
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I may be over-generalizing things here, but I think this is all a reaction against the stereotype of getting married right out of college. It may be old hat, but realizing that we have options in the dating world is pretty cool.
I don't think people want to be stuck with someone they don't see being with in the long-term. This annoys both men and women who are interested in finding the right person, but don't want to settle down too quickly.
I'm at a point in my life where I would like to share who I am with somebody. The extent of the sharing is hazy, but I'm willing to give it another try. I know there's doing or not doing, but the perception of dating/relationships is still something we cook up in our imaginations versus actually accepting who we are.
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Maybe she's just not that into you.
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Okay, we need to discuss this fully when you come to NYC. I think I have the answers.
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Even if the guy is nice it doesn't mean that there will be a connection between them to create a relationship. There is such a thing as casual "dating" and nowadays with the divorce rate so high I don't see why being with people in a casual basis is wrong. You need to figure out what you want in a women and then find that person that wants the same things that you do.
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Dear Anonymous,
There is nothing wrong with casual dating; in fact, I support and preach it. However, I believe that people have different definitions about what "casual dating" is.
Another thing for everyone: This entry wasn't directed at any one person. It was just some thoughts in my head after experiences I've had in the past and observing things my friends are going through.
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I think some people are just reactionaries. They get hurt so in order to not get burned again they are aloof and insensitive and "whatever" about the opposite sex. I hate the word "whatever" by the way, such a cop-out. I call bullshit on boys or girls that are reactionary "you can't hurt me cuz I am gonna have up this bulletproof armor and act like a dick when it looks like you care for me." Why peeps think that admitting you care for someone is the equivalent of a wedding proposal I just don't know. Run screaming in the other direction just because somebody likes you? I definitely call bullshit on this.
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I can only guess what happened this weekend. (psst, that's sarcasm)